“Dr.” Dave Williams has some advice for you!

Dave Williams
Does that screen behind him have something to do with nuts?

via davewilliams.com

Did you miss The Rapture? Maybe you were too busy with other important things like following Trump’s Twitter feed. Perhaps you were sound asleep — zonked on Ambien. There are just so many, many things that could keep us from, … something.

According to Dr. Dave Williams the Rapture is imminent. It might even have occurred:

If you are reading this after the rapture has occurred, it’s because you weren’t ready. Jesus said in Matthew 25:10 that “those who were ready went in … And the door was shut.”

Let me give you 20 pieces of counsel to survive this terrible time if you miss God’s first roundup, the rapture.

First things first. Dr. Dave sports an honorary doctorate from Canada School of Theological Studies whose existence seems limited to Dr. Dave’s bios. Perhaps that is Canada Christian College and School of Graduate Theological Studies. Canada Christian College is known mostly for its anti-Semitism via its Department of Jewish Studies.

Moving on, I have subjected Dave Williams’ “20 pieces of counsel” (the first 11 actually) to a zealous drivelectomy:

  1. Do not believe the explanations given by the secular media.

    Christians have not been beamed to some interplanetary spaceship to be reprogrammed. …

  2. Get rid of your cell phone.

    … you will be hunted. Your cell phone can be tracked. Throw it in a river or lake far from where you are going to be.

  3. Do not kill yourself.…
  4. Repent immediately and make your peace with God.

    If you’re reading this after the rapture, you’ve already witnessed many of the events we described. Now is the time to repent.…

  5. Make sure you have a printed Bible.…Keep your Bible in a safe place because when the Antichrist’s government takes over, he will eventually try to destroy all the Bibles.
  6. Leave your home and get away from the cities, especially the big cities.

    You’re going to be tempted to wait and see what happens, but if you do, it will be a fatal mistake, just as it was for the Jews who waited too long during the holocaust years.…

  7. Dr. Dave needs a history lesson. Aside from the fact that Holocaust (capital “H”) imagery is offensive, Jews were trapped within the Third Reich.

  8. Pray for God to help you and give you strength.…
  9. Don’t go to church.

    That’s right—don’t go to church or join the world conglomerate religion because it will be under the control of the false prophet …

  10. Get a small, self-powered radio.…
  11. Keep praying for your loved ones who are unbelievers.
  12. Leave copies of this list for as many people as you can.

    Perhaps this will help others survive and come to Christ. Be discerning, however, in giving out books like this if the rapture has already occurred.…

Pieces 12 through 20 will be in Williams’ promised part deux.

The question, of course, is whether or not Williams believes any of this. Then I ponder whether or not anyone else takes this seriously. Dr. Dave is an easy target for sarcasm. That’s not my fault. Williams sent out engraved invitations.

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